Thursday, May 19, 2005

Top 5 Things I wish I had never done...

Okay ... here's the thing. I'm trying to cancel my already confirmed ticket to Hell and I'm hoping that I can at least get on the wait-list to Heaven when my name pops up in God's Microsoft Outlook calendar schedule. So the first thing to do is admit your sins. Here we go...


1) Too Fast Too Stupid?

While in India, I once pitted myself (driving a car) against a motorbike rider. I drove for about 10 minutes like a madman, taking sharp turns in front of buses, skidding onto sidewalks. It was 11 pm but there was enough traffic to make this a really stupid idea. So you're thinking --- hmm...that sounds kinda cool and exciting. Well it's not if you've got your MOM in the same car with you. More than the fact that she gave me an earful, I hated myself for not only jeopardizing my life but more importantly jeopardizing hers as well. If I wanted to be stupid, I should've gone ahead and been stupid by myself. No need to take such a kind and loving person with me on my ride to death.

2) Cheat and you shall receive?

Yep...done that. I've cheated in some exams. I wish I had never done that.... especially since I know I'm capable of doing it the right way. Where I stand today in life is because of my abilities and not my exam scores. So in theory, if I am able to sustain a successful career, there must be something worthwhile in this head of mine. And if that's the case...WHY CHEAT in exams!! Bad Bad Bad thing to do. There's a lot of academic pressure in India to succeed. Trust me, the American education system is like a honeymoon to us Indians who've come out spending 22 years in India getting educated. But that's not an excuse to cheat.

3) They're not's a mirage !!

There was a time in my life when I had given up everything ... everything including my ability to think clearly and life normally. I had given all this up for friends who really didn't care that much for me anyway. It was a completely imbalanced friendship and by the time I was done being friends with them, I was filled with nothing but regret and remorse for wasting that much time and giving up that much. Now, when you've got lots of regret and remorse... you should either drink yourself to death (which I didn't do) or be patient and let things just settle down (which is what I did). It took years for me to learn to respect myself again. It has been uphill from is good and I love it.

4) Screwed up my Grade 12!!

Okay so if I hadn't gotten a miserable and wretched score in my Grade 12 in Bombay, I would not have had to spend 4 years commuting 2 hours each way by train everyday to go to this back-of-the-beyond Engineering college just because my grades weren't good enough for main-town colleges. Those are 4 very forgettable years of my life academically. I really really wish I had gone to a better undergrad school. The flipside to that is that I met Noddy there. She's an academic ace but she ended up in that college because she had just moved to Bombay and admissions were already over elsewhere etc.etc.etc. In any case, I do have that to thank my stars for. I met her, we dated, we came here, we studied more, we got married and I haven't regretted any of that even the slightest. But yeah I do wish it was a better undergrad school. Nevertheless, my fault there for messing up my grades when they mattered the most.

5) Take her advice three times a day

Okay so I guess every teenager is guilty of this. And now I look back and think of the words of advice that mom used to give when I was a teenager. It was a perennial struggle. I refused to listen to her and she refused to give up. After all these years, in retrospect, she was right most of the times. Maybe it's a "dumb teenager" phase that everyone goes through...or maybe it was just me. In any case, I do regret the heartburn that I caused her as a kid. She's obviously forgiving enough like any mom is and she brushes it off with , "Ah don't worry about it. Every child is like that!". I won't say that things in my life would be much different had I listened to her. No, I think I still would have ended up where I am. It has nothing to do with that. It's just that all that time I could have enjoyed with her, I spent locked up in my room and ignoring her just so that she wouldn't try to help me. How silly is that??? Mothers are meant to help and give advice. That is part of their job description. I guess the perk to their job is that their kids listen and pay heed. My mom obviously didn't get that perk most of the time. That's my regret. Love you Mom !!!


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