Thursday, August 11, 2005

And today there is a 20% chance of showers ...and where is your BADGE !!!!

Do you remember the weathermen of yesteryears? They didn't have sophisticated graphic pointers to point at charts. They didn't have little thumb devices that changed the background maps when pressed. And they certainly didn't use dumb lingo that makes weather confusing. Yet they were more or less, exactly as accurate as today's nut-cases when it came to predicting weather.

This guy points to a very colorful area near the mid-west which was apparently a "pop-up" storm. Now, I'm quite not up there in the weather-IQ section so it took me a while to understand this term. It apparently means a storm that comes out of nowhere. Yet, it's predictable by the weatherman so it doesn't exactly come out of nowhere.

Anyway, I must've been overzealous and installed a pop-up blocker on my house because there hasn't been a single pop-up storm in our neighborhood although clouds threatening some major popping did show up a couple of days ago.

I think being a TV channel weatherman is one of those glorified jobs that has been made into a widget-like manufacturing process where nothing changes. The real weatherman jobs are done by people employed in the National Weather Service which traks hurricanes, storms and major life threatening natural havocs so that they can warn people before it happens. Armani suit clad people predicting "pop up showers" in my neighborhood aren't impressive. They hold the same importance to me as the security guards in my company who continuously stare at people's waists to ensure that they have their company badges hanging off.

Speaking of corporate security guards, that's another profession that's overrated in most companies. Would you laugh if I told you that the most exciting part of the day for our company's security force is when they make an employee use the side entrance instead of the front entrance. See, the front entrance is reserved for guests and other non-NCR people coming for official meetings. The employee worker ants have to use the side entrances from where we can slink away into our cube holes. Apparently we look like shit or something. Anyway, if an employee accidentally decides to use the front entrance (for whatever reason) he shall be immediately reprimanded for this by at least two very alert security guards. These will then feel very proud of themselves for stopping such a gross security breach. They are also the same people who will allow you only ONE phone call to someone inside, if you have forgotten your badge. Sounds more and more like a prison camp doesn't it? This is a TRUE story. This guy was a product manager and didn't have his badge on. He told the security guard to call Mr. X so that X could escort him inside. Well X happened to not be at his desk at that moment. So he told the security guard to call Mr. Y. The security guard said, sorry I can't do that. You're only allowed one phone call. Rule-made-on-the-fly. So this guy had to use his cell phone to reach others , which by the way, is perfectly acceptable. Another unknown and vicious attack on employee lives was thus saved by our brave Mr. Security Guard.

Hurray for weathermen and corporate security guards. I'd like the weatherman wear T-shirt and jeans and read me a bulletin from the National Weather Service and claim no stupid credit for his doppler radar. As if without this stupid doppler radar, the weather satellites sitting up in the air would've not given us any indications whatsoever. I'd also like for the security guard to start cleaning the dirty carpet in the building. He'll add more value than trying to chase badgeless unsuspecting employees at the front gate.


Blogger Archana said...

Weathermen........never trust them. It rains when they say it doesnt and it doesnt when they say it does. My predictions are much much muchhh better.

1:48 PM  

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