Wednesday, September 28, 2005

UFO Airstrip

But before I get to that .... Noddy's foot keeps getting better and better and at this rate, she'll be fine within two to three weeks. I don't believe in knocking on wood and/or crossing my fingers. Knocking on wood has not proven to have bone-healing effects. Crossing of fingers may actually cause unwanted deformations....

Okay, now onto the main title of this post. So there's this mayor who decided that his town really lacked an airstrip for UFO's to land. This is happening in Puerto Rico, where the government is asking employees to shorten their work weeks because of an obscenely high budget deficit.

This freak-show mayor insists that this is for tourism and is one of the few who claim to have seen "flashing red lights". Maybe he was too drunk and came across a traffic intersection, saw flashing red lights and decided that it was un-earthly.

BTW, this extra terrestrial landing strip is being built by a guy who claims to have talked to ET's family since he was a kid. he's known them this long ...and he still wants to live on earth???????? That just blows my mind. He also must not be very good friends with them because they've never taken him to see their home. They just leave him on this planet. They know what a bad idea it is to take a human to some uninhabited land. We'll kill the folks on their planet (or star), claim it as our territory and let the remaining minorities setup casinos on land they used to OWN. Here's the kicker - he's a school teacher. So he's possibly educating the young ones about how completely sane this concept is.

Would it be funny to go there in an alien costume? Or would you get worshipped and loaded with lots of money cos they'll think it's a real alien? I don't know..but it sure would be a great thing to try as long as you have a getaway spaceship ready in case they discover who you really are!

Oh by the way, the article is here

Thursday, September 22, 2005

While Noddy was bed-ridden

My post here gives you some background on Noddy's current general state of health. She's still recovering from her fracture but can walk around and has been going to work for the past couple of days.

Anyhow, a couple of funny events are worth blogging about.

Noddy would get very bored at home when she was totally bedridden. So we decided to take her grocery shopping with me. Obviously she couldn't walk so we had to find a mechanised wheel chair. Now, Meijer (our grocery store) has such mechanized "shopping carts" for their customers with disabilities. These are essentially motorized wheel chairs operating on rechargeable batteries with a shopping cart attached to the front. There's a handle in front, a lever to go forward and a lever to go backward. Sounds fairly straightforward? Not when you get on it and try it. It's like riding bumper cars. You will never get the direction right and you will never go at the speed you want. Now imagine that we put poor little broken Noddy on this "ride" and made her drive it in a crowded grocery store. The results were hilarious. When making turns between aisles in the store with this thing, she would tend to set her broken foot down on the floor as you would do if you were riding a motorbike. And I was always like, "Don't do's broken". The foot would promptly go up and we'd make an F-1 style turn....wheeeeeeeeeeee!!! right into the aisle and right into all those poor shoppers. The funniest part was when I was peering at something in the stationery section and I heard a loud thud behind me. I swung around to see if she was alright. She was fine, however, the thud was from her hitting one of their racks where they keep all the goodies. She was trying to maneouver this crazy thing and in that process, she thoroughly tested it for Frontal and Side Impact Crash Test Ratings by hitting merchandise racks in that store. She will be sending her results to the NHTSA which maintains such records on automobiles.

The second thing I learnt was this. We had a lot of food leftover from the babyshower we hosted 10 days ago. This has all stayed refrigerated since then and we've had some of it during the days when Noddy was totally immobile. When she could finally walk she decided to inspect the refrigerator. To my utter shock, she threw away almost 90% of it. My argument was that it has been safely stowed away in the fridge for this long and therefore is fine. The theory behind this argument was that if you take food and put it in the fridge, you bestow total and complete immortality upon it until you finish eating it. As long as the shield of frigid temperature surrounds food, nothing can happen to it. Either that or it has to really change colors dramatically for you to become cautious and throw it away hesitantly. Well apparently I was wrong on both counts as Noddy (the resident FDA inspector of my home) inspected each container and gave a yay/nay vote to it (mostly nay). So that was a good lesson that food in the fridge does have an expiration date no matter how many degrees above or below freezing it's stored.

Other than that, work continues to suck as usual and there's no more about it that I can blog.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Improving bovine relations with our neighbor

As you might know (if you watch non-local news of any kind), India and Pakistan are improving relations with each other. They know if they nuke each other out then all that money the corrupt politicians have hoarded will be kinda wasted because they won't be alive to enjoy it.

Now, when countries like America and Russia improve relations, they talk about technology, defence, energy and business cooperation. India and Pakistan - understandably so - want to take baby steps instead of talking about all that big stuff. So we decided to see if we can come to an agreement about exporting cows, buffaloes and goats. If we can do that, then we'll see how we feel about exchanging maybe simple stationery equipment such as Scotch(TM) tape or pens and such..... baby steps.

Anyhoo, it doesn't stop there. India has taken the stance that it respects cows (Hindu religion) and Pakistan wants cows so that it can support it's needs for beef. Therefore, India cannot export cows because it offends religious sensitivities of the Hindu majority population. This is quite understandable because you try not to eat for lunch what you worshipped in the morning. However, what completely boggles my mind is that India is AOK and super cool with exporting beef !!

Think about that for a minute. So if it's a live cow, then we're real sorry we will not be sharing it with you. It shall instead loiter on our streets in a very respectable manner. But if it's a dead cow, well then it be damned we're going to ship it off and make some money off of what's left of it. Hmm...hypocrisy at it's funniest. So for non-Indians the lesson is, we really revere and are very sensitive about the live cows and the dead ones we put on Ebay plus shipping and handling charges.

In all due respect, if you revere the cow then respect it more in death than in life. If India takes the stance about not exporting cows for beef due to religious sensitivities, that's very agreeable. But be straight enough to take that stance in it's entirety and not just when the cow can actually breathe.

Bottomline, if you are worship the cow like crazy in the morning and eat beef-jerky as a snack then stop doing one of those two things....preferably the worshipping part because it's far more insulting than the beef-jerky part.

Monday, September 19, 2005

I'm dumbfounded....

United Parcel Service is a leading mail carrier based in the United States but with operations worldwide.

UPS no longer accepts cash for C.O.D services.

C.O.D = Cash On Delivery.

Hmm... okay that makes words coming out of my brain for this.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Where am I?

At least a week's worth of blogging not done. Everyday I had so much in mind to blog but couldn't.

A few days after my last blog post, Noddy started complaining about a pain in the ball of her foot. Assuming it's just a-pain-in-the-ball-of-her-foot we concurred that it should be left alone to wane away. Well the pain decided to un-wane and grew constantly from that point on. By the previous Thursday evening, Noddy had to do nothing to her foot and she would experience these shooting searing pains that would originate from the ball of foot and travel outwards.... a terrifying situation indeed.

The Friday before last was spent visiting the family doctor, getting X-rays and knowing that this is possibly a fracture. Apparently, the X-rays did not show a fracture to this doc. Pain medication, crutches and some special shoes were welcomed into our home with much fanfare hoping that they would help the situation. The fact that we had to host a baby-shower last Sunday did not ease anything. The pain medication gave Noddy a false sense of security through Monday. For some wierd reason, the pain doubled on last Monday and we were off again..... this time seeing an Orthopedic doc on last Tuesday. He looked at the same X-rays that the previous doc looked at and clearly saw a fracture. Okay so maybe I should go to this previous doc's office and read his qualifications certificates hanging on his wall to make sure they're not from University of Phoenix Online Medical Program. The Orthopedic said it's gonna take about 6-8 weeks to completely heal but she can start walking around hopefully by Tuesday.

Noddy has pretty much been confined to bedrest since then. She entertains herself very well and doesn't let the bed-imprisonment get to her. It's a good thing she's light because I am carrying her up and down whenever needed. The house is now under my command (heh heh heh) and I am the Lord and Master of this mansion. Unfortunately, that also means I am the Janitor and Housekeeper of this place. Lunch is nowadays at home as I drive back from work and nuke some food for Noddy before heading back to work. Evenings are spent preparing some ice-packs, nuking dinner, replenishing her side-table supplies for next morning and then just enjoying the time with her.

Okay so you see clearly why I couldn't type as much as I would've liked to....

Blogging to get better from now on again...

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Losing your job over your blog...

After that Google guy who got fired, here's another case of someone losing their job because of what they blogged about.

In a way I can see both points. I can see the company not wanting confidential information leaking out or negative criticism of their employees being discussed publicly.

On the other hand, if this person really did not give out any information that compromised company secrets they should be able to sue to get their job back or at least compensation enough that they won't need their job. If they did not compromise company information in any way then they should be able to file a lawsuit alleging discrimination for views expressed on an open forum ... isn't that First Amendment or something ..?

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Hocking Hills

Highlight of the weekend ... a 6 mile trek at Hocking Hills from Old Man's Cave to Cedar Falls(with some extra walking in the middle).

Cute pic of me and Noddy atop a rock at Old Man's Cave. The site was really amazing. It was great to see what water can do to a rock over many many years. So much for a rock being "rock solid".

This is a picture of a very warped tree root that I encountered in our walking trail. There are lots of interpretations of what this looks like including - octopus, squid, crab and many more.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Having a chat conversation...and just that.

First there were some clinky messenger tools - hard to use, limited capabilities etc etc. Then funky stuff like MSN Messenger , Yahoo Messenger and others came along and added bells and whistles. Now, in an instant message tool, you can check weather, local stocks, this that ...everything. But the REAL reason you installed it was to chat isn't it? Most of us don't install MSN Messenger to check stocks. We install it to send instant messages and now it has evolved into this behemoth beastly thing of which instant messaging is a small part.

Similar case with cell phones. We need cell phones for clear conversations with others. Instead, now we can do web browsing, picture messaging, text messaging, teeny camera thingies, and a gazillion other things that have NOTHING to do with calling someone using a cell phone. Again, manufacturers lost sight of the core reason for people having that device.

Enter "Google Talk" ... which is Google's chat messenger offering. I installed it thinking, oh no, here comes ANOTHER chat messenger. After I installed it, I noticed something very very different. It does nothing but CHAT !!!! How novel is that idea. Say, I installed a chat software that allows me to just chat. It does not allow you to have "display pictures" next to your name. It doesn't allow you to put "smileys" and it doesn't allow you to check the weather in your grandmother's bedroom to ensure it's not too hot and humid for her. But hey, it lets me chat beautifully and I absolutely love that about it. I would uninstall all my clunky trumpet messengers just to have Google Talk so I can "talk" to people without icons, without smileys and without weather information.

And if I need to check the weather in my grandma's bedroom I won't be using a chat software... I'll use which gives me JUST weather and does not provide ability to chat with others who might also be looking at weather.

I love tools that fulfill the very purpose for which they were created.